Kari read Colossians 2:13-14, which say "And even though you were dead in your transgressions and in the uncircumcision of you flesh, he nevertheless made you alive with him, having forgiven all your transgressions. He has destroyed what was against us, a certificate of indebtedness expressed in decrees opposed to us. He has taken it away by nailing it to the cross."
I love that image, of God dissolving all our debts by nailing them to the cross, where the greatest sacrifice was made for our ongoing sin. I first began to imagine what this means in the context of India and our work with Sari Bari. Certainly, the general society of India does not see any reason the women of the red light districts should be loved, redeemed, or helped. They are worthless to society's eyes, except perhaps for the small physical service they supply at great cost to their health and well being. What Sari Bari is doing is a social scandal in India. Respectable Indians are taking jobs as staff and associating with, even creating deep bonds with, women whom the society sees as dirty, damaged, and worthless. It is a social taboo to have friends in the red light districts, to go visiting there, to invest your time and emotions and energy in the betterment of those who live there. But God calls us to forget those debts owed to a "proper" society, to give without expectation of return, and to love without concern for the worthiness of the recipient. Therefore Sari Bari, Free Set, and others like them are entering into scandalous love relationships here in India.
Personally, I began to think about my own epiphanies about my worth in God's eyes. I could never do anything to deserve a perfect God's love and affection, in fact I daily make conscious choices counter to his will and enter into behaviors that lessen my worldly worth. I fail often and I fail big time. And yet I am still somehow told to believe that God sees me as his precious, beloved daughter. Dearer to his heart than words can express. I don't deserve that!!! And for a long time I've struggled against the voice inside me that will not let me accept that love because I could never deserve it. But the truth I've met deep inside my heart brings me more joy than I could possibly tell you, and it says "You have it anyway, go and give it to others!"
For this reason, I also began to connect how this deep internal truth God has given to me has influenced my attitudes and actions towards others. I knew when Kari read Luke 6: 27-36 that from the beginning, deep in my heart, I have taken these challenging commands quite literally. They say:
27 “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29 If
someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone
takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. 30 Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. 31 Do to others as you would have them do to you.
32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. 34 And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. 35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful."
These verses are challenging because in real life they seem to be impossible to live sustainably. We think "if I give this man my coat and my tunic won't I freeze to death tonight?", "If I give loans without expecting repayment won't I be out of money and homeless?" I don't have answers for these questions, but deep inside my soul I have always known that when gifts are given freely God will make a way for the rest. So, what does this mean about the way I feel called to live my life. I think the last verse of that passage could be stated in another way, as it is spoken in my heart: "Be scandalous, just as your father is scandalous."
I have always grappled with my feelings on large social/political issues. I know that the country must function, and that requires certain restrictions on giving, but my heart of hearts wants something more. It wants me to put my faith in God's provision and support these unsustainable, crazy, scandalous, beliefs that would give to thieves and honest men, support the lazy and the truly unfortunate, forgive the worst offenders and the righteous equally. NONE OF THIS IS FAIR! NONE OF IT MAKES SENSE! NONE OF IT IS PRACTICAL! It is a scandal, and my heart loves it more than anything. This grace, this mercy I feel God calling me to live and act upon may be just radical enough to change those who receive it. It may actually make those who don't deserve it better, rather than worse. We always assume that if you give people an inch they will take a mile. Well, maybe if you give them a mile, they will give you back an inch... or more. It's hard to put limits on this belief, it makes it easy to be taken advantage of, but God promises that good works will bear good fruit. I have to believe that as long as I am acting in a way that benefits others, God will take the rest and work it out for good. This scandal is what my whole being longs for, it makes my heart at peace! It gives me the strength to believe that perhaps, one day, people will truly and honestly change how they treat each other; entering into relationship with love instead of desiring repayment. I know, it makes no logical sense, but it's what is in my heart, and I wanted to share it with you.
